We often think of “good” kids as those who listen and follow rules, but what if constant compliance comes with a long-term cost? Dr. Becky talks with Dr. Sunita Sah, author of *Defy: The Power of No in a World that Demands Yes*, about rethinking defiance, the downsides of over-compliance, and helping kids balance cooperation with self-respect. Get the Good Inside App by Dr. Becky: https://bit.ly/4fSxbzk Your Good Inside membership might be eligible for HSA/FSA reimbursement! To learn more about how to get your membership reimbursed, check out the link here: https://www.goodinside.com/fsa-hsa-eligibility/ Follow Dr. Becky on Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/drbeckyatgoodinside Sign up for our weekly email, Good Insider: https://www.goodinside.com/newsletter For a full transcript of the episode, go to goodinside.com/podcast Thank you to our sponsor Hot Wheels. Check out our full series with Hot Wheels at hotwheels.com/challengeaccepted Thank you to our sponsor, Airbnb — because during the holidays, it’s nice to love your family *and* have your own space. Find your getaway or host your home at airbnb.com/host Thank you to our sponsor DREO. Check out the DREO Baby Humidifier at https://bit.ly/3WtcliS and use code Becky20 for 20% off. Ever feel like you love your kid but don’t really *like* them right now? Join Dr. Becky’s live workshop, “Why Is Everything a Battle?”, on Wednesday, November 19th, to learn why your “resilient rebel” acts the way they do—and get real strategies to make power struggles easier. Visit goodinside.com/defiance At Good Inside, we’re shifting the narrative - away from instinct and toward education - because parenting isn’t something that just comes naturally. And the first step to real, cycle-breaking change? Understanding yourself—and the patterns you fall into. I’ve said it before: every parent has a pattern. But have you ever stopped to ask… what’s yours? Take the free quiz at goodinside.com/better to discover your parenting pattern.