Thank you to today’s sponsors: Monarch: 50% off your first year with code WOI https://monarch.com You know those moments you can’t shake, when everything looks perfect, but deep down you feel a chill that says, “something is wrong”? What if the real danger isn’t what you see, but what you don’t see: The hidden drives, the shadows, that play out behind closed doors? In today’s episode, I sit down with philosophy researcher and shadow work expert Previn Karian to expose the psychology of why women end up in cycles of pain, manipulation, and even abuse, and how recognizing the “shadow” in ourselves and our partners is the first step to walking away with dignity and power. This one is raw, honest, and truth-telling. We dig into uncomfortable places, but it might be the perspective shift that sets you free. Here’s exactly what we dive into: - The “male shadow”: How to recognize when it’s not your job to “fix” him (and what to do instead). - Why super successful, charming men aren’t always safe (the “bigger the light, the bigger the shadow”) - The difference between sadism and masochism: How these hidden drives play out in both men and women - How women’s own shadow makes us vulnerable to repeat cycles of abuse Chapters [00:03:28] Don’t Get Seduced by “Light”: Why Success Isn’t Safety [00:09:21] How Sadistic Drives Show Up: From Microaggressions to Violence [00:13:19] The Giselle Pellico Case: Shadows Hiding in Plain Sight [00:15:21] The Masochistic Man: Nice Guys, People Pleasing, and Hidden Rage [00:19:03] Spotting the Difference: Explosive Rage vs. Quiet Depression [00:22:13] Why Men Lack the Language for Their Pain [00:28:56] The Core Shadow Wound of Women, And How We Overcome [00:34:49] Can Women Be Sadistic Too? Rewriting the Narrative [00:36:58] The Masculinity Crisis: Feminism, Power, and the Red Pill Backlash [00:52:29] The #1 Thing To Do When You See His Shadow [00:54:16] Why You Can’t Rescue a Man (and What Real Support Looks Like) Follow Previn Karian: Website: www.tec4mind.com The Empty Chair Online (Facebook Community): https://www.facebook.com/groups/1119909063319697 YouTube channel: https://www.youtube.com/@TheEmptyChairMind Follow Me, Lisa Bilyeu: Website: https://www.lisabilyeu.com Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/lisabilyeu/ Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/lisabilyeu Want to search through every episode, explore specific topics, or ask me questions directly? Check out my Dexa page: https://dexa.ai/lisabilyeu WARNING: I will never ask for your contact info in the comments section. That’s 100% a scammer.