Anger is an easily accessible default emotional state for some men, and managing it requires overcoming the impulse to act on grandiose feelings.

“especially for someone like me for whom anger such an easy default”

Abuse and interpersonal violence are often driven by a cycle where one transitions from the feeling of shame to a grandiose state of righteous indignation and attack.

“as you know central to my work on masculinity is the translation of shame into grandiosity of feeling less than inadequate unlovable somehow to the one down of shame and then you flip into the one up of grandiosity superiority better that attack a Beijing angel righteous indignation”