What happens when a Mormon woman becomes the primary provider for her family –inside a religion that teaches her highest purpose is in the home? In this deeply personal and honest conversation, Cate Smith shares her journey growing up Mormon, internalizing the Family Proclamation, and believing her eternal destiny was marriage, motherhood, and supporting her husband. From being voted “most likely to be mom” as a teenager to entering the temple and covenanting to hearken to her husband, Cate explains how clearly her path seemed laid out for her. But life didn't unfold the way Mormonism promised. After earning a degree in accounting “as a backup,” Cate unexpectedly became the breadwinner, while her husband stepped into a more nurturing, stay-at-home role. What followed was grief, identity loss, social pressure, depression, and eventually therapy –along with the realization that the only thing wrong with being a working mom was being Mormon. As Cate began questioning gender roles, authority, and worth, those questions expanded into a full faith crisis –sparked by therapy, church culture, the Family Proclamation, Ensign Peak and SEC fraud revelations, racism in church history, and the fear-based framework of Mormon belief. She shares how integrity ultimately mattered more than certainty, and why she chose to resign from the Church before she even fully believed it wasn’t true. Cate’s story is raw, thoughtful, and deeply relatable –especially for women navigating faith, motherhood, careers, and self-trust after leaving a high-demand religion. Show notes can be found on the Mormon Stories blog here: https://www.mormonstories.org/mormon-mom-becomes-the-provider-for-her-family/ Timecodes: 00:00:00 Introduction 00:01:20 Intentions for Cate Smith 00:02:43 Where her Mormon story begins 00:06:38 She was voted in school as “most likely to be a mom” 00:09:16 What were the messages she received on her purpose as a woman? 00:14:57 She attended Utah Valley 00:17:45 Going through the temple for the first time 00:26:48 Getting her first accounting job and making more than her husband 00:30:56 She decided to work and put off being a stay-at-home-mom 00:39:24 Questining her from an orthodox Mormon standpoint 00:44:23 What was it like for her husband to be raised as the breadwinner and being Mr. Mom? 00:52:27 Did her children suffer because her family was going agasint the norm? 00:56:38 Going through the timeline before her faith crisis 01:00:04 What is the church offering me at this point? What is the point in going to church? 01:11:46 She worried about harmfulness in the church 01:14:33 Her boss tells her about the SEC Filling, astonished at the amount of Money the Mormon church had 01:04:28 Is sharing nuggets of disbelief helpful to believing family? 01:29:52 How did she and her husband gracefully exit? 01:33:28 She believed in a God that asked people to do bad things for the sake of truth 01:40:22 Feeling existential dread after she lost her faith 01:41:59 She improved her relationship with her body first, then food, etc. 01:46:42 Confronting suffering 01:54:06 They’re closing on their first house next month 01:58:58 Final questions for Cate ___________________ At Mormon Stories we explore, celebrate, and challenge Mormon culture through in-depth stories told by members and former members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints as well as scholars, authors, LDS apologists, and other professionals. Our overall mission is to: 1. Facilitate informed consent amongst LDS Church members, investigators, and non-members regarding Mormon history, doctrine, and theology 2. Support Mormons (and members of other high-demand religions) who are experiencing a religious faith crisis 3. Promote healing, growth and community for those who choose to leave the LDS Church or other high demand religions 🤝Help us continue to deliver quality content by becoming a donor today One-time or recurring donations: https://donorbox.org/mormon-stories?default_interval=m Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories Venmo: https://account.venmo.com/u/mormonstories Paypal: https://paypal.me/mormonstories Join this channel to get access to perks: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCx6OgmoqJbOVRq-Lv1P7SzA/join Our Platforms: 🌐Mormon Stories Blog: https://www.mormonstories.org/episodes 🎙️Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/mormonstories ✳️Spotify: https://open.spotify.com/show/4sDzk7dRjODTSEqzZKZJzk?si=148b0efc1ccc4404&nd=1 🍎Apple Podcasts: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/mormon-stories-lds/id312094772 🖼️Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/mormstories 📱TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@mormonstoriespodcast 🎮Discord: https://discord.com/invite/kuX5p6yyjF Contact us: 📧 MormonStories@gmail.com 📬PO Box 171085, Salt Lake City, UT 84117